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Here is a good rule to follow; Don't refer to anyone as a shemale, transsexual, transvestite, etc.until you have asked what she prefers to be called.Understand that not all t-girls are the same - It is important that you have at least a basic understanding of the various types of t-girls.A common mistake is to assume that all t-girls are the same.
Using good communication skills, you will be able to learn about the t-girls you meet and sort through them to find those that interest you the most.
When you are e-mailing, chatting online or exchanging Instant Messages, you must rely on mere words to make a good first impression.
You will want to carefully choose your words so you don't come off as offensive.
A politely worded inquiry should prompt a t-girl to let you know exactly what term she considers most appropriate.
If you must use a term, rather than a person's name, perhaps the term transgendered is the least offensive of all the terms.