Problems dating chinese women
But while dating seems to be on the rise, marriage is still unusual—thanks to political differences that are often irreconcilable, according to the women I spoke to, who were all between 21 and 25, prime age to start looking for a husband in China.The real “danger” of love between a Chinese woman and a foreign man is that it doesn’t ultimately go anywhere, the women I talked to said.It was interesting at first for Xu to learn about Spanish culture from her ex-boyfriend, she said, especially after feeling she had nothing to talk about with Chinese guys in her age because “everything is familiar.” But the remark about China’s former leader, Mao Zedong, was too alien, she said. She’s not happy about the word “dictator,” because that makes Mao the equivalent to Adolf Hitler or Joseph Stalin, Xu explained.“In his eyes, Mao was a horrible figure,” she said, “but he doesn’t know our parents’ generation still thinks he was amiable and respectable.” Many Chinese people in their fifties or sixties still sing “red songs” to pay tribute to Mao, and carry out memorial ceremonies for him annually, so he shouldn’t just identify Mao as a “dictator,” she tried to explain to him. A 21-year-old college student in Beijing, who would only like to be identified as Jean, tells me she dated a guy from the US two years ago.Your Chinese girl will also become more openly loving; maybe often holding your hand, touching your arm, maybe resting her head in the area between your head and shoulder and so on.Bear in mind, though, that she will also become more possessive and it’s wise not to look too long at other pretty Chinese girls if your lady is around.Clearly, misunderstandings and some miscommunications are going to arise in the early days but an application of good common sense and pragmatism usually can help prevent or solve any major issue which may arise.Here are some key points for foreign men to bear in mind when dating Chinese girls: if you are not serious about the relationship with your Chinese girlfriend, don’t visit her parents and family; however, do enquire about their general wellbeing, health and any newsworthy matters she may have mentioned don’t dominate or be the centre of attention at social gatherings—you need to earn respect from the friend of your Chinese girl and her family.
These days, you can’t help but notice mixed race couples almost everywhere when you travel around any Asian city or even to smaller towns.Don’t drink too much alcohol, try not to smoke and certainly don’t take drugs Picking the right type of Chinese girl, like any romantic attachment, is driven by our emotions, and is hardly the same as picking, say, a colour to paint the bathroom walls—is it? We base our choices on our inner feelings, and our perceptions of the physical beauty or attractiveness of our potential mate.However, the question may arise whether your Chinese girl is a “traditional” or a “modern” woman but even this becomes secondary to the primary “suitability for mating” requirements which our brains have already sub-consciously noted and endorsed!Once the initial shyness has dissipated and your Chinese girlfriend gets to know you better, know your likes and dislikes—and of course you get to know hers—you’ll start to see a whole new persona being to emerge.She’ll almost certainly become more confident in her English language ability and you’ll be surprised how quickly, and how well, Chinese girls can argue or scold you in English—if the need arises of course; the trick, though, is not to give her the reason to do this!
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The relationship lasted for just six months, because Jean found they “couldn’t communicate” because of their “different standpoints.” Jean’s ex-boyfriend was nine years older than her, and a graduate student in international relations at another Beijing university.